The Rest of the Pre Wedding Story

Today's news won't wait another day. I've waited for months to pen the perfect story, one that would inspire others to keep hoping, believing, and living into their dreams. But this morning yields a new understanding of the verse, "if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out!" What do I want to cry out? I'M GETTING MARRIED. I've spent the last nine months pondering and treasuring all that was transpiring in my heart. Today I give you the big news! Soon, hopefully, I can share more from the heart. But know you got the scoop here first! #myheartisshouting #fromtherooftops #luke19:40#luke2:19 #turningpamturney #storyoftheday #shesgettinghitched#godisfaithful ##dreamsdocometrue

The above post appeared on social media this past week. The response has been overwhelming. Thank you for all the heartfelt wishes for my upcoming marriage. And now, for the rest of the story..

I will marry my best friend and confidant on November 12. The journey to get here has been marked with abuse, pain, and loneliness. Honestly, I had resolved, that most likely a man would not be part of my single mom life until after my children were out of school. I am glad I was wrong. I am glad my heart was open. 

I wasn't looking for a husband and Marty wasn't seeking a bride the first day he walked into my little country store Graves Grocery. He was looking for a biscuit. Country ham to be exact. The biscuit, and maybe the friendly atmosphere, brought him back. And he kept coming back. And he stayed for long periods of time. It didn't take a rocket scientist to determine he was lingering on purpose. After many weeks, he finally invited me to dinner....again and again. And now we are here.

For the last decade I've been a single mom to five children. Lawren, 24, has been married to Brandon for two years and they are seeking full time Christian missions. Mary Catherine, 22, will graduate in the Spring from UNA as a Division II National Champion Softball player. John, 18 year old senior, Hannah ,16 year old sophomore, and Thomas, 14 year old freshmen all attend the local high school and are actively involved in sports, friends, video games, and life. I wanted you to know a little about them because Marty is getting all of us.

ISN'T IT AN ABSOLUTE MIRACLE THAT A MAN WANTS TO MARRY A WOMAN WITH FIVE KIDS?

Our recent beach trip with a few extra..because more is merrier.

God is still in the miracle making business. Don't ever stop believing, hoping, or dreaming. He truly does give us the desires of our heart as we trust in Him, delight in Him, and commit our ways to Him. (Psalm 37) What miracle do you need today? Will you trust Him for it?

These past nine months of getting to know one another has been a journey of faith that I never expected. I've never known a man like Marty, one so solid in his faith...like a steady ship that sails steadfastly through the waters, eyes fixed on the prize of heaven, as he goes about life day by day. It's been a steadfastness or security that has handled the tumultuous emotions of a broken woman, failed marriage, now small business owner, and headstrong, maybe even stubborn woman.

Occasionally I was asked by well intended friends, "what are you looking for in a man?" That answer was quick and easy. I'm looking for a man sold out to Jesus so he doesn't look to me to fulfill all his needs. I'm looking for someone to enjoy the journey of life with." Marty asked me early on in our relationship, "what do you see in me?" It was easy to respond. "I see Jesus and that makes you the most attractive person in the world to me."

Turning Pam Turney...November 12, 2016

I now know why Ruth has always been my favorite bible story. For years I kept going back to it for so many reasons. First, Ruth's commitment to her mother in law Naomi, after all the men in their life died, was unwavering. It became a picture for me of our commitment to God. Secondly, I didn't want to become bitter, like Naomi, from a failed marriage. Finally, I wanted to believe that, like Ruth, God would, in His divine supernatural way, place me exactly where I needed to be, at the right time, for His man to see me, be interested, and pursue me. I tried singles groups. It was miserable. I tried online dating. It was scary and a time waster. Finally, I relented to waiting...waiting on God to move. And when he did, I chose not to give into fear. I took Him at His word and slowly learned to take Marty at his word.

One of the greatest lessons in life I have learned is that God is always working. As we faithfully go about the tasks He has before us each day, caring for those He's entrusted to us, and serving Him wholeheartedly, He is watching. 

"For the eyes of the Lord move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His." 2 Chronicles 16:9

We don't have to seek out love. He will bring it to us. It will be beyond your wildest dreams and more than you could ever imagine. Those aren't my promises. They are God's. (Ephesians 3:20) I love the story of David. He waited over 20 years to become King of Israel after being given the position as a teen. We see many stories of waiting in scripture....Noah, Moses, and David are just a few. I have found it is in the waiting that God is shaping our hearts, renewing our minds, and strengthening our faith to ready us for all He has for us.

Psalm 78:70-72 speak about God removing David from his day to day job to bless him with more.

He also chose David His servant

And took him from the sheepfolds

From the care of the ewes with suckling lambs He brought him

To shepherd Jacob His people,

And Israel His inheritance.

So he shepherded them according to the integrity of his heart

And guided them with his skillful hands

I see this story played out in my own life. As a single mom, day after day, I decide to do the right thing to work and care for my children. I take seriously the commands to train a child up in the way he should go...to disciple my children...to live out the gospel in my home. God has blessed my meager fish and loaves and afforded me the privilege of running a small business in my community. He has grown the business over the past three years. And NOW He has brought me a Boaz, a man to join my story of redemption by loving and caring and committing himself to me.

It will take the rest of my  life to wrap my head around this. But I plan to savor every moment of it.

Whatever you are waiting for, as a believer, know that your heavenly father is watching. He sees the desires of your heart because He gave them to you. Keep trusting, keep believing, and keep waiting. 

GREATER IS COMING.

The wait has been so worth it.

No longer waiting,

Pam

I wasn't looking for a husband and Marty wasn't seeking a bride the first day he walked into my little country store Graves Grocery. He was looking for a biscuit. The best I recall it was country ham to be exact. The biscuit, and maybe the friendly atmosphere, brought him back. And he kept coming back. And he stayed for long periods of time. It didn't take a rocket scientist to determine he was lingering on purpose. After many weeks, he finally invited me to dinner....again and again. And now we are here. You will have to read more of the story online from my blog found at www.gravesgrocery.com

I wasn't looking for a husband and Marty wasn't seeking a bride the first day he walked into my little country store Graves Grocery. He was looking for a biscuit. The best I recall it was country ham to be exact. The biscuit, and maybe the friendly atmosphere, brought him back. And he kept coming back. And he stayed for long periods of time. It didn't take a rocket scientist to determine he was lingering on purpose. After many weeks, he finally invited me to dinner....again and again. And now we are here. You will have to read more of the story online from my blog found at www.gravesgrocery.com

I wasn't looking for a husband and Marty wasn't seeking a bride the first day he walked into my little country store Graves Grocery. He was looking for a biscuit. The best I recall it was country ham to be exact. The biscuit, and maybe the friendly atmosphere, brought him back. And he kept coming back. And he stayed for long periods of time. It didn't take a rocket scientist to determine he was lingering on purpose. After many weeks, he finally invited me to dinner....again and again. And now we are here. You will have to read more of the story online from my blog found at www.gravesgrocery.com

Story of the Day, June 20, 2016

Today was definitely Monday. And although I COULD find a high point it would be a stretch. I guess my high point was I got to eat leftover smoked chicken cooked by "Two Cooking Dads" for Saturday's concert. It was just as good as Saturday. But, boy, was today tough. Began with me arriving early to clean up the concert mess from Saturday only to realize I was locked out of my own store:). Yes, it's Monday. So what I REALLY want to share is how amazing Friday was. My morning started with my sweet young single mom friend @melanieyepma showing up with her 3 kiddos ALL WEARING THE CUTEST HATS! They were headed west on vacation to visit family AND THEY CHOSE TO EAT WITH ME. I'm the lucky girl. I gave them exactly what they wanted, candy for the road, demanded a picture, and prayed for safe travels while standing in a circle in my New York (one butt kitchen) to which her oldest responded, "praying again? This is the third time!" I quickly reminded her that we could never pray enough. What a great lesson for us all and how I needed it today. They got on their way and lo and behold the dashing damsel @tampaxoxo Andrea Conway showed up ...first time ever. An absolute best friend in middle school! She was visiting her folks in Huntsville and drove out for coffee and conversation. She reminded me of fun times growing up that had been overshadowed in my mind by darkness. Thank you! Sometimes another's perception is all that's needed to shift perspective of a situation. I'll never really understand why they come but oh how grateful I am they do. Sometimes it feels like I'm living the dream like Kevin Costner in Field of Dreams when he said, "if you build it, they will come." So I'm holding onto Friday's stories Of the day and singing Annie. "The sun'll come out tomorrow, bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow will be a brighter, better day:) ‪#‎storyoftheday‬ ‪#‎myfieldofdreams‬ ‪#‎friendsforever‬

Story of the Day , Friday, June 3, 2016

It's the weekend! Yay! And tonight's our first concert of the summer. The next three Saturday nights will be fun filled events from 6-8 at the store. But I wanted to wrap up our week with my logger friend Jason Moon. I met Jason when I opened the store three years ago. I watched him pull that big ole log truck right into the lot, pull himself down, and come inside for a Mountain Dew and a pack of Marlboro Lights. He had a winsome smile and legs that went on forever. My granddaddy would have called him "a long talk drink of water:)" Over the years I got to know Jason. I would ask questions about his life and family. You can learn a lot with a few short questions when you've made people feel safe enough to open up. Sometimes Jason's route takes him a different direction from the store and I might go months without a visit. I knew his wife was battling breast cancer so I thought of him often and prayed for his family when I did. Recently he returned from a long absence to report to me he buried his wife two weeks ago. Men can have such a direct way of communicating that pierces your heart but I new underneath there were layers of grief from a life built together. I've spent the last month making sure I asked different questions like, "you look terrible, are you eating? Or I forgot to pray for your family on Mother's Day but I wanted you to know you were only heart." I've fed Jason a couple of times and Thomas even bought his breakfast once he knew of his loss. I've also made sure I hug Jason....physical touch makes a person feel alive when they are hurting and alone. Jesus touched people during his earthly ministry. Who can you touch today to encourage...a smile, a kind word, a prayer, a hug...it makes all the difference in the world to know someone cares. ‪#‎storyoftheday‬ ‪#‎lovemyloggers‬‪#‎griefhurts‬

Story of the Day....Thursday, June 2, 2016

Probably the hardest part of my job is losing friends who became customers as well. Yesterday after work I attended the estate sale for Ms. Bonnie, who lived a atone's throw from the store. She passed away last fall. Her son Barry Kay played music at the store the previous spring. And I had the opportunity to meet her daughter during our flood victim relief collection when she brought a big bag of donations up to the store. But nothing prepared me to walk into the home of my friend who passed...to see her relics, her style of decor, her kitchen where she cooked. It was an emotional experience. I made my choices carefully to have her keepsakes her in the store and at home. I led a ministry at the local Methodist church for three years. Ms. Bonnie volunteered every chance she could. It reminded me of the importance of leaving a lasting legacy. Every time I think of Ms. Bonnie I am reminded of her servant heart, her kind spirit, and her devotion to God. What are you doing to leave s lasting legacy for your family and your community. ‪#‎leavealegacy‬ ‪#‎storyoftheday‬

What Happens When We Hope

My Mary and her teammates board a plane at 6am in the morning for the Division II Softball National Championship Tournament to be held in Denver.

Getting to this place hasn't been especially easy, particularly for Mary. After two years of playing for a nearby community college, breaking records, coaching, and loving life, she transferred to UNA after a year hiatus from ball. The year between playing seasons proved to be quite challenging. There were relationship hurts, job disappointments, and those challenging years when your friends are marrying, moving, etc.  Yet, the year brought growth as opportunities opened up for Mary to come on board at UNA to return to her passion of ball. After the fall pre-season games, the holidays, and her first semester, Mary was the player posting the following at the beginning of the season:

Mary Graves

January 11 · Instagram · 

Today is the day it begins. Today is the day we begin our fight for a conference title and a national championship ring. If one of us fails we all fail. If one of us succeeds we all succeed. The beauty of a having such an incredible team is that each individual has a different skill that will fill the flaws of another individual. We are a team of strength, confidence, talent, and hard work. We will do whatever it takes to overcome our opponents. I love this family.
LETS FREAKING GO. 💜💛🦁💛💜

I believe this post was only a couple of days before Mary broke her hand while moving a sofa down a flight of steps helping a friend to move. As a mom, might I say the next 8 weeks were LONG AND HARD. The injury Mary sustained kept her from returning to the game this year; although, she eventually resumed work outs and practices. There were lots of texts, conversations, prayers, etc. And over the course of the season, I watched something beautiful take place.

Mary's own fan base:)

Mary's teammates and roommates!

Mary's role changed for the team. She became for them what she's been for me and our family. A strong support. My daughter has taught me more about hope the past 18 months than I've ever known. She's taken the hard places of this season of life and found hope to press on believing good was in store for all.

"Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isa 40:31

When we are walking in difficulties, when the pain is great and the circumstances aren't changing, we can rest in the peaceful contentment of Christ...I shared with Mary I can only imagine what God has been preparing her for these past 18 months because there has been disappointment after disappointment.

"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow faint or weary and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary" Isa 40:28-30 I've seen this verse come to life in Mary as He strengthened her.

How are you instilling hope in the lives of your own children? Are you hopeful? You cannot share what you do not have. Life can be so so challenging. Would you ask God today to show you how He is your hope in this world for a life of peace and joy in spite of your present circumstances?

You can watch Mary and the rest of the UNA Lions as they take on  Arkansas Tuesday 5pm cst. It will be live streamed on the UNA website.

Go LIONS!

The Pre-Conference Weekend Getaway

When my friend Heather first asked me to help with her recent big adventure, I hesitantly agreed but took a deep breath knowing it was merely days from my own next big adventure. There wasn't any available free time as preparations were being made for our first Mom Heart Conference but; yet, I could hear the excitement in my friend's voice. This was really a big deal for her. And she asked me to give two devotions. That was a big deal for me. So, I said yes. And boy, am I glad I was open and available for the unexpected.

Recently, I discovered Heather and I share a dream of owning and operating a bed and breakfast. This weekend adventure deemed "Heather's Eat, Drink, and 40 Wink Craft Sleepover" was to be a beginning of her dream. About fifteen women had paid money and signed up to sleep over to create and share fellowship with one another. Little did any of us know what we had in store.

 I was the first to arrive that morning. The farm dogs chased me up the long driveway, which hides the homes of both Heather and her sweet parents, Mike and Nell. As I topped the hill of the driveway, I felt as though I was entering some sacred place of rest. The cows were grazing on the left. Nell was heading to the barn on the right, with that winsome smile of hers, and I believe I passed Mike on the golf cart as I drove in. Realistically, I don't think any of them purposely intended for things to be so picturesque. They were simply handling daily chores, subduing, or bringing to productivity,  what's been given them. Because God's given me eyes to behold beauty, it was truly an inviting entrance.

After literally being threatened by Clem, the blue tick hound, I safely made it to the door. God, how I long to have a  male protect me, in that manner. That blasted dog worships Heather. And she treats him like another child. That dog reminded me of Ruth...wherever Heather goes, Clem goes.. Heather's people are Clem's people...although that took a lot of settling into.

Once finally inside safely, before even seeing Heather, I noticed how bright and lovely everything looked. There was light streaming in every window on the east, color splashing, and beauty abounding. Although, I had never seen Heather's home a wreck, it was almost as if there was an anointing pouring out of every room. Sometimes I think, as a believer, you've just got to be looking for God and you will find Him. The ancient prophet Jeremiah says,

  "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your  heart."

Heather promptly reported she didn't lay down til 5am...it was 8:15. I could sense a teensy bit of anxiety or fretting, but only a teensy bit. When you are doing what you love, it's empowering, although; it can boost our adrenaline levels sky high. So I prayed for her. What a privilege to invite God into our day, knowing and believing He only had good in store for the day.

Jeremiah 29:11

"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out--plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for."

Women began trickling in slowly, relationships began forming, and beauty began increasing. I slipped nextdoor, stepping over the dog barrier, to experience a different kind of beauty, Heather's mom's kitchen. Once I saw Nell's home, I understood where Heather acquired her love for creating beauty in her home...from her Momma, right next door. Nell was finishing up the chocolate gravy and homemade biscuits, which we carried over together to the ladies.

The remainder of the day is to be experienced personally but my story is simply to give you a little peek into what happens when a woman leans into God and her dreams. 

Heather gathered us around to share her heart about our time together, allowing each lady to introduce herself. Afterwards, we headed downstairs to begin creating. Her daddy Mike was ready with the jewelry tools in hand to help us ladies. By the way, Heather, along with her family and friends, had transformed the basement, adding a vintage bathroom complete with a trough shower stall and metal walls. She had made space for eight vintage beds, covers, canopies, you name it. It was literally like entering a fairly tale land.











We shared delicious food and drink. too many snacks, and created til our hearts were overflowing...well after midnight. During the meal times, I was privileged to share my heart about having a life giving home...a place for our families to become and belong. It was a rich time for all of us, to welcome the Bread of Life into our conversations as we broke bread together with shared fellowship and prayer.

Acts 2:42-47

"They committed themselves to the teaching of the apostles, the life together, the common meal, and the prayers."

In hindsight, it was as if in my perspective, God took his mighty hands, pulled back the clouds a little, and gave each of us women in Heather's home a view of heaven. Through shared time, tears, and laughter, I believe we each left with hearts full and hungry for more of the good life God's promised to His children.

If you ever need a beautiful space to get away or want to join an upcoming event of creating in Heather's home, take the initiative to sign up and go. God is there. You can meet Him, enjoy Him, and leave a better person. Saying yes to Heather to participate in her adventure not only enlarged my heart, but better prepared me to minister the following weekend at the Mom Heart Conference. As shared recently by my mentor Sally Clarkson,

"God has friends for you that you don't even know you need."

Heather has been one of those friends. Are you open to learn from the people God keeps bringing across you path? Will you ask God to help open your heart to invite others end. I promise the rewards are great.

How are you using your own gifts and abilities to draw others in that they too might better know the love of God? I would love to hear from you about ways you are seeing Him in your daily arenas of life.

Love,
Pam